operation harelip BJ is a go
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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