Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
