Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
