So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
i need an iv and a liver transplant
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
