We won't sleep together?
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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