it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
You're like the curious george of whores
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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