their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize
