There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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