U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
