ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Randomize
