Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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