My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
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