Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
