OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
