the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
