More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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