quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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