There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
my being single is dangerous.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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