Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
