A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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