We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize
