summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
