Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize