I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
