do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize