someone threw a dead crab at me
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
