did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
