I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
