Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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