I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
sex in a hospital.. check
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
