All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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