I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Randomize
