you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
