She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
