dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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