You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
