i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
