I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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