i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
