David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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