That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Randomize
