Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
