Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
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