That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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