I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
