Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
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