dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I understand Curling. That high.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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