i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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