My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
