I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
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