Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
