Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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